Shrinking S2, Episodes 5-6: Approach with an Open Heart
Breakdown of the fifth and sixth episodes of the new season of Shrinking on Apple TV+
Note: This recap is spoiler-filled! If you haven’t watched it yet, maybe come back after. In the meantime, you can catch up with my reviews of episodes 1-2, episode 3, and episode 4. If you’re still catching up on Shrinking Season 1, you can read my recap here.
Thanks for your patience last week. I was struggling to string thoughts together, and I feel like my recap/analysis would have been a rambling mess. It may still be a rambling mess, but a little less so, I hope.
Episodes 5 and 6 of this season of Shrinking begin to play out some of the stories that were introduced in episode 4. Summer discovers that Alice slept with Connor. Gaby and her sister are figuring out how to deal with their mom and the repercussions of Courtney’s addiction. Liz is struggling to find purpose. We begin to see the ripple effects of Brian’s decision to reach out to Louis. Paul is facing some of his past issues. And we’re seeing that explosion that Paul predicted for Sean.
Again, there are so many stories to discuss, but I want to focus on two - Paul’s relationship with his ex-wife Susan and Alice’s choice to forgive Louis. (I may come back to talk about Sean’s relationship with his dad later because, dang, that is also so, so good, and I think I will have more to say about this show when the season is over.)
The lead-up to the scene between Paul and Susan is great. Wendie Malek is an absolute delight, and I love the interactions between Julie and Susan. Being an ex trying to foster some kind of relationship with a new love interest is weird and uncomfortable, and I think they capture the vibe well, especially for a couple who has been divorced for years. But what they also captured brilliantly is the way that guilt can continue to exert itself if it is never dealt with.
We learn that Paul cheated on Susan, and his guilt about that led not only to the disillusion of their marriage but also to the estrangement that happened between Paul and Meg. By never acknowledging his shame about that, he lost out on decades of a relationship with his daughter, as well as something amicable with his ex-wife.
Paul is clearly a talented and knowledgeable therapist, but even so, we see that he struggles to apply his understanding of behavior to his own situation. We see that with Gaby and her sister as well. Knowing what actions to take doesn’t make it easier to follow through on those actions. I appreciate that Shrinking shows that knowledge is only part of the story. Application is something else, and sometimes that takes a really long time, especially when shame is involved.
The thing that struck me about their interaction was when Paul tells Susan that he avoided her because he was a coward and because he thought she would be interested in shaming him, and then he says that he should have met her with more goodwill. Shame tells us that we are unlovable and that we are unworthy of forgiveness, and for many of us, that results in putting up walls that keep us from what might hurt but what also might result in comfort.
I also love that their conversation is cut with the conversation between Sean and his dad, where Sean approaches Tim with an open heart and is met with negativity. It’s a reminder that sometimes the shame that other people are carrying might have nothing to do with your own healing journey. (But again - I’ll probably get into that dynamic at a later time.) It’s just an important reminder that we are only responsible for what we bring to an interaction.
One of the biggest moments from these two episodes was Alice going to Louis’s house and forgiving him.
This season deals heavily with forgiveness. It is a massive part of what runs through almost every storyline. And this is one of the most beautiful examples in the entire season.
Alice seems unsure of what she wants when she demands that Brian take her to meet Louis. She knows that she wants to talk to him, but she doesn’t know what she wants to say or what she wants from him. Which is incredibly relatable. I have definitely been in situations where I know that I need to say something, but when it comes to specifics or what kind of response would “fix me” - that is all a mystery.
I think Louis gives a good example of what to do if we are the person who did the wrong thing. He apologizes, and then he asks Alice to share a memory of her mom. Hearing something like that could be painful, but it is also a way to connect with the person you have wronged. To allow them a chance to vent, but also to talk through their emotions in a way that might lead to healing for both of you.
And we see that with Alice. As she recalls the story about her mom and the Goofy hats, you can see her soften. She is remembering the person that her mom was and how she wants to be that person. Remembering that her mom was a woman who sought to make things better for the people she loved, but also for strangers, Alice sees that her mom would want Louis to find some sense of peace, and she offers that to him.
I think about forgiveness a lot, and I think sometimes it can be offered as a way to avoid feeling discomfort or demanded as a way to avoid accountability, but sometimes, forgiveness is a way to heal something that is broken. It can be a way to allow yourself to let go of a pain that you’re holding onto.
In these two scenarios, forgiveness isn’t a cheap fix but rather something thoughtfully offered and gratefully received. I think that is worth celebrating.
Best joke: Jason Segel does an excellent flounce when Alice gets punched in the boob and doesn’t want to leave, but doesn’t want to talk to him. I love good physical comedy, and that was very fun.
Best cry: When Alice says, “I forgive you.” Bawling.
What’s an example of forgiveness that you received or offered that made a difference in your life?